Weekly Spark #181: Social Fitness
We all know the importance of fitness. Most times, we think of this as strength, stamina, endurance, stability, flexibility, etc. In the modern day, we are grossly underestimating the importance of social fitness. In fact, average social fitness levels are at record lows and only continuing to plummet as we engage in deceptive exercises drastically decrease our social fitness.
In the Mental Diet, I shared an article titled “Why Americans Suddenly Stopped Hanging Out,” which the article attributes 3 main drivers to our decreased social fitness: people substituting in-person time for screen time, people being far too busy and over-scheduled for meaningful social time, and the erosion of the meaningful social opportunities in communities. As the article states: “Face-to-face rituals and customs are pulling on our time less, and face-to-screen technologies are pulling on our attention more. The inevitable result is a hang-out depression.” Social connection has been shown to be one of the largest drivers of longevity.
This reminds me of Vrabel’s House of Well-Being, which I shared as part of WS in December of 2022. Sure, we have the foundation of sleep, diet, exercise (these 3 in intentionally sequential order of importance), meditation, followed by the pillars of exploration, meaningful social connection, and learning. What’s a house with no roof? Engaging in those 7 activities is only half the battle. Reflection is paramount in importance to living an intentional life.
While we could discuss all 8 pillars in detail, the most important to today’s discussion is MEANINGFUL social connection. Meaningful social connection is far different than your merely social connection, which has likely contributed to people’s low standards for what it really means to have friends, connect with others, and be in engaging and fulfilling friendships and relationships. Social media has unquestionably contributed to the demise of the depth of friendships; People confuse their real friends for followers.
What you can do to improve your social fitness:
Create meaningful time and space with people who you share a deep connection and values alignment with. 4 quarters will always outweigh 100 pennies
Understand that social media does nothing to deepen relationships. It may provide opportunity for connection, but merely serves as a launchpad for true and in person relationships
Expose yourself to a wide variety of social situations
What you can do to erode your social fitness:
Focus on aggregating the largest number of friends and followers on social media. Go an inch deep and a mile wide
Rely on social media in place of spending time with people in real life
Hang out with people that you don’t share values alignment with and who don’t push you to be a better person
Mental Diet
Article of the Week:
Why Americans Suddenly Stopped Hanging Out
Great article about the decline of social fitness in America. Insightful and well worth your time to read.
Quote of the Week:
“Whatever is happening to you has been waiting to happen since the beginning of time.”
I hope you enjoyed reading as much as I enjoyed writing. Until next time… Take care of yourself and take care of each other. 🙏
Nathan