Weekly Spark #178: Be Decisive
Decisiveness. The ability to make decisions quickly and effectively. There are two types of decisions: decisions that you make and decisions that others make. Being decisive boils down to making YOUR decisions quickly and effectively, and accepting OTHERS’ decisions quickly and effectively.
On our journey to decision, we can be hamstrung by indecision. Any decision is better than no decision. What leads to our indecision? In my experience, it comes from our tendency towards caring entirely too much about what other people think, as well as perfectionism. Outside influence can make you second guess yourself a million times over. It’s important to value what other people think as a litmus test, but placing too much stock there will lead to mental ruin. Ask yourself: do I even care what XYZ thinks? If the answer has any hesitation, disregard in your decision making process.
Perfectionism is the other hurdle to clear in decision making. None of us are perfect. We never will be. We will make wrong decisions. The key is to be as intentional as possible to limit the “wrong” decisions in all areas of life, but particularly the 3 big rocks: what you do, where you’re at, and who you’re with. Those sum up to your life. I hate to say you need to nail all 3, but you better be pretty darn close. You can pivot, but don’t use that as a crutch to continue making bad decisions. The world doesn’t hand out second chances like water at the Boston marathon, so being intentional here is probably the highest return on invested time you can give yourself for a life well lived.
When it comes down to decisions that others make, decisive people accept others’ decisions as they are. People will make decisions that positively affect you and negatively affect you. They’ll make decisions that are the outcomes you want or don’t want. That’s life. Accept and proceed. It’s generally not hard to accept outcomes that align with what we want. So let’s focus on the latter. Oftentimes, I see people trying to barter with these decisions, wanting someone to change their mind, or see if they can finesse or manipulate a different outcome. What’s that energy worth? Even if you get someone to change your mind, why settle for hesitancy?
Confidence drives decisiveness. When making your decisions, it’s important to take the necessary time for reflection, self knowledge/awareness, perspective taking, and being confident in your process and the level of intentionality that you put into the decisions that you make. That will insulate you from the outside noise and allow you to proceed unencumbered, with unwavering belief, recognizing that you aren’t perfect. Be confident in accepting the decisions of others. Again, they might not always go your way, but you have to be confident that those decisions are made in your behalf to lead you to a better, higher place. If you don’t fight the outcomes and let the cosmos take you where you’re meant to be, you’ll find that’s often the case. It all takes time. Confidence and decisiveness.
Mental Diet
Quote of the Week:
“Decision is a sharp knife that cuts clean and straight; indecision, a dull one that hacks and tears and leaves ragged edges behind it.” - Gordon Graham
I hope you enjoyed reading as much as I enjoyed writing. Until next time… Take care of yourself and take care of each other. 🙏
Nathan