Weekly Spark #101: There Is No Self-Made Person

I hope you enjoyed a restorative weekend! I also hope you enjoyed the first rendition of Nathan Notes, sent out last week to all subscribers of The Weekly Spark. This version covered “Give and Take” by Adam Grant, and I will be publishing Nathan Notes periodically as I read insightful books containing lessons that I feel would be beneficial for a larger audience. So far I’ve received helpful feedback and welcome any and all additional feedback as you continue to sift through the Nathan Notes exercises. I know the time that I put into creating it, and the time that I take to sit with the material; it works if you allow it to.

Think about the last time you heard someone say: “oh he’s a self-made man.” (As this topic is not gender-specific and for consistency’s sake, I’ll use “self-made person” to refer to both men and women). When someone says that, what do they really mean? That person came from nothing and they’ve made something of themselves, likely a nod to how much money or “success” they achieved? They didn’t have it handed to them, weren’t born to a large inheritance, and had to “do it themselves.” In all contexts I’ve heard it, that’s what people were referring to.

In a synthesis of multiple sources of the origin/meaning of the phrase, I’ve arrived at a few short sentences to describe the way society views it. A self-made man is one who has achieved wealth, status, success etc., through their own efforts and hard work, rather than merely by luck of birth, inherited fortune, family connections, or other privileges. More consideration is given to those who come from a poor background.

I have the utmost respect to people who have achieved success under those circumstances, and tip my cap even more to those that achieved it without the luck of birth, inherited fortune, family connections, or other privileges. But they’re not self-made. I would bet that they would agree with that statement as well. No one who has achieved anything did it alone. Sure, they may not have had the head start that others had, maybe had to scrape through college on their own dime, or start a business with their meager life savings, or forge their connections themselves, but they weren’t self-made. Someone, somewhere along the winding road of life, helped them and walked with them in their journey to help them get to where they are today. It could be a mentor, boss, professor, teacher, neighbor, or one of the many people who reached out to lend a hand; they didn’t do it alone.

It’s ok to admire “self-made” men and women, but what are we really admiring? And what are we really encouraging? Supporting people who persevered and worked hard without a head start is one thing, but believing that success is an individual effort achieved alone is another. The next time you hear someone talk about a self-made person, hone in on what they actually mean… There is no self-made person.

Mental Diet

Quote of the Week:

“None of us, acting alone, can achieve the success.” -Nelson Mandela

I hope you enjoyed reading as much as I enjoyed writing. Please share with a friend, family member, co-worker, or someone who may benefit. If you found value in this piece, please click the “like” button at the bottom of this page. If you have alternative viewpoints to something I wrote, please send me a message as I’d love to discuss and expand my knowledge/perspectives on the topics that I write about. Take care of yourself and take care of each other; let’s stay positive and make it a great week for everyone around us! 🙏

Nathan